So yesterday I woke up and had enough. My rooms were a disaster. Clutter was everywhere. Laundry, clean not dirty was everywhere. I have to much shit. My best friend Chris felt I wasn’t going out like I used to including little errands that I would purposely run just to get out and move. I lost all motivation and while I sit here and type this I have no idea why.
So I got off my ass and put my shit away and threw a bunch of shit away including a DVD player because I have 3…yes one is portable but it can be hooked up to play on TV. Over the spring I got rid of 2 large trash bags full of clothes. I do NOT know how I accumulated so much clothing. I know Matt Hack is laughing cause I do recognize I have issues buying clothing when we do anything. Yes we plan on going to NYC and I have to stop and buy a new outfit instead of wearing something I own. Retarded but fun 
. So anyway I have moved my exercise equipment out from under the clothing and am have started again.
When I started this over a year ago I was in, for me good health. Things went downhill. My shoulder surgery prevented me from doing anything which was limited to begin with. I tried to make a comeback in April I think but I failed. No excuses, no reason just let it go. I fell into a funk but now I am back. I do not know why I fall into these dark patches but I do. I know I am in love and it is maddening to know that he doesn’t love me. I know and believe he cares about me but he can’t love me I accept that but people can’t help how they feel.
Another issue is people talking to me unsolicited, shut up. You are sitting here right now talking and I am not replying. You ask me what is wrong, nothing is wrong except your voice. Shut up. There is no nice way to say it so I can’t. It would crush this person if I told them I DO NOT WANT TO TALK right now and I have no idea what you are rambling on about so…shut up.
So I got up had my protein shake and went to work on the bike. I started slow. 15 minutes while watching Kitchen Nightmares. I love Gordon Ramsey. He should be a judge on every reality show. I did 50 each arm with the 10 pound weight. and 25 sit ups. I am burnt out which shows the half ass attempts I keep making are worse then just doing an hour of exercise a day.
Now…to stop drinking beer. RB ily 
Wood
